Matchmaker

Matchmaker is a minor antagonist who appeared in Mulan. Mulan visits her in search of a husband. There was a little incident that happened during her visit where Cri-Kee gets in the matchmaker’s tea. As she drinks her tea, Cri-Kee jumps from the teacup into her hanfu. He crawls and jumps all over her, causing her to fall in the lit fireplace. Her clothing then catches the fire, and Mulan has to put it out with the tea.

Matchmaker then reappears in Mulan 2, alerting Yao, Chien-Po, and Ling that they need personalities before they return.

Transcript with Matchmaker in Original Film

Matchmaker: "Fa Mulan."

Mulan: Present.

Matchmaker: Speaking without permission.

Mulan: Oops.

Grandmother Fa: Who spit in her bean curd?

Matchmaker: Huh. Hmm. Mmm. Too skinny. Hmph! Not good for bearing sons. Recite the final admonition. [muffled chirping]

Mulan: Mm-hmm.

Matchmaker: Well?

Mulan: [clears throat] Fulfill your duties calmly and... respectfully. Um, reflect before you snack. Act! This shall bring you honor and glory. [sighs]

Matchmaker: Hmm. This way. Now, pour the tea. To please your future in-laws, you must demonstrate a sense of dignity... ...and refinement. You must also be poised. [purring]

Mulan: Um, pardon me.

Matchmaker: And silent! [sniffs] Ahhh.

Mulan: Could I just take that back?

Matchmaker: [grunting]

Mulan: One moment.

Matchmaker: [screams]

Mulan: [gasps]

Matchmaker: Why, you clumsy... [chirping] Whoo! Whoo! Aaah! Whoo! Aaah! [sizzling] [screaming] [screaming louder] [loud crash]

Grandmother Fa: I think it's going well, don't you?

Matchmaker: Put it out! Put it out! Put it out! [panting] You are a disgrace! You may look like a bride, but you will never bring your family honor!

Transcript with Matchmaker in Sequel

Matchmaker: I've found wives for hundreds of men, but the Golden Dragon of Unity himself couldn't make love matches for you three! Come back when you get personalities!